The Jam Cruise Forum

You've been a lovely audience .....

I hope you have enjoyed this performance piece I have entitled .....

MESSAGE BOARD DOMINATION 2008: POST OR PERISH

And I think we all know who it's dedicated to ...

Col!

I did it all for you, buddy!

TOP OF THE WORLD, COL!!! TOP OF THE WORLD!!!!

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सङ्गीत दोलायते मदीय हृदय

the most activity this board has seen in weeks.the board was getting cobwebs in its vagina.

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livin' my life like it's golden

(rimshot)

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सङ्गीत दोलायते मदीय हृदय

thanks for proving my point about the asinine bullshit. anybody that doesnt check the board frequently who is actually hoping to get some useful information out of it now has even more crap to wade through to find it.

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Shredding the high seas since 2007

I just ate a brownie.

It totally rocked!

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I'll be somebody different I'll be better to you

no applause, please no applause, first I'd like to thank....

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Yippie! It is time to groove.. and "the Grateful Dead are the greatest band in the land"
- Bill Graham ?

You win! Here's your fabulous prize!

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http://www.hotspotentertainment.org

So what are you saying?

We should be wearing hip waders?

col?

I'm sorry but what sort of "useful information" were you looking for on the board?

A cure for cancer?

The answer to pi?

Does Tyler Perry make a new movie once a week?

MESSAGE BOARD!

Not the Koran.

Not the Bible.

Not even the freakin' Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue.

An internet message board where assorted humans write whatever is on their minds about a variety of topics.

Because seriously .... At this point it seems like that not only are you obsessed/fixated/have a big ole girly crush on me but you don't seem to realize that A - YOU started this. And B - As long as you respond to my posts that you swear you hate yet continue to read and comment on, I am going to reply.

Let it go. Move on. Find someone new to despise and revile.

Something else you might want to consider .....

I see alot of other screenames accused of being me .....

....Maybe you should be accusing me of being someone else

For all you know I could be abgar .... Or Faust ..... Or even katmama ......

Perhaps I am a riddle surrounded by an enigma inserted into a condom ......

Makes ya wonder ..... Hm?

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सङ्गीत दोलायते मदीय हृदय

If you think I actually read even half the sh1t you posted yesterday, you're kidding yourself.

As for the value of this board, there's plenty of information on here about musicians and events all over the country-- that is after all what brings us together here, music. Just because YOU don't contribute much of anything useful doesn't mean everyone else sees the board as a waste of time.

I suppose you like to think your a big fish in our proverbial pond, but you're more like a turd in the kitchen sink.

If you want a place to test out some more 'jokes' might i recommend one of the fine boards on PhantasyTour.com. I suspect I've already seen you over there too, but you certainly wouldn't stand out so much in that sea of assh0les... many of whom are much more adept at transmitting humor via message board than you, my friend.

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Shredding the high seas since 2007

You want relevance to go with your coffee? Good luck!

It is widely known that even Sir Tim Berners-Lee also is genuinely concerned (and working hard to fix it) about wading through all the irrelevant information on the web (ie, asinine bullshit, but I disagree with use of the latter term*) on the web he invented??? The W3C even acknowledges part of the problem, which is sarcastically termed the world wide wait.

Now let's discuss forums and some communication theory. Can we understand the relevance of n(n-1)/2? There's a possible explanation, or at least a start (that goes beyond our run-of-the-gin-mill personal attacks).

BTW, there is a "search" facility on this site (as the one we all know called Google, which is arguably good enough to have made its inventors billionaires). These were specifically designed to help us wade through murky waters.

I enjoy reading (and writing) nearly all of these board posts, even the most irrelevant ones (most of which are also very funny). Everyone has a story and I'm glad they share them. If I don't want to read it, I skip it.

Right now I can better understand that the tolerance of people for flotsam and jetsam on the web, which may be directly proportional to their reading comprehension as well as filtering abilities [but I digress and would prefer to refrain from any personal attacks, such as "turd in a kitchen sink" or "fly in the ointment". Incidentally, what did that kitchen sink turd do to you and why are you letting your cats get up on the counter? ].

If you need a board with more rules and control, it's very easy to start one yourself. But managing a board is no simple task, once it gets popular (however, if you have too many rules, noone will post, which makes your life easy). If you want a perfect board, only invite people you know and trust. That should be a suitably short list.

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*Note: About the term "bullshit": I detest to see such a succinct term overused and maligned like this. "Bullshit" specifically refers to communication by those who know they are lying. Sharing stories and funny anecdotes -- however irrelevant -- is not "bullshit" in the true sense of the word.
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"Murky" Waters ....

...."Muddy" Waters evil twin brother *


* If you have interpreted the previous statement as "asinine bullshit", I would like to apologize for wasting your valuable time. To make up for this, here is an interesting piece of knowledge so all the time you spent reading this hasn't been a complete waste:

In your lifetime, you will eat and swallow 8 spiders while you sleep.

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सङ्गीत दोलायते मदीय हृदय

UNLESS .... It is used in the following way .....

"So, col walks up to me with this pile of bullshit in his hand and he says "Oh, man! I almost stepped in this!" *


* If you have interpreted the previous statement as "asinine bullshit", I would like to apologize for wasting your valuable time. To make up for this, here is an interesting piece of knowledge so all the time you spent reading this hasn't been a complete waste:

Your heart is actually not the size of your fist, as people commonly believe. Take your thumb and forefinger and touch them to your nose and chin with your mouth closed. Your heart will fit perfectly into that opening.

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सङ्गीत दोलायते मदीय हृदय

Here is some good reading from memory lane for all of us who are landlocked....

WE DID IT ALL FOR YOU COL!!!!! ALL FOR YOU!!!

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I'll be somebody different I'll be better to you

this is much funnier 5 years later and i still didn't read most of it.

ps... jamcruise is still awesome.

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Shredding the high seas since 2007